A look at the fascinating and often infuriating sub-culture of Mothers...from THE MOMMY MAFIA; the Urban Dictionary of Mothers by LJ Charleston - publication date late 2013 - with more than 100 different categories of weird & wonderful Mothers. From Olympic Mom (My kid was walking at nine months, what's wrong with yours?) to Can't Stop Breeding Mom (six kids and another on the way!) Thrift Shop Mom (this dress only cost me $2!) to Natural Birth Interrogator Mom (WHY did you have a C-section? You really missed out on the real motherhood experience!)

Remember, in motherhood, a woman is more dangerous than a shotgun.

If you thought meeting the parents was tough, now it's time to meet the mommies.


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Monday, May 25, 2009

I'm Over Being a Mom

The I'm-Over-Being-A-Mom women act as though motherhood is a gigantic burden and constantly whine and moan about how hard it is being a mother. They live for the day the kids are old enough to go to school. Always speaking nostalgically about pre-mom days. Remember when you could go shopping alone? Only had yourself to look after. Travelling at drop of a hat. Sex whenever you felt like it, I've gotten so used to kissing my kids' faces that it feels foreign kissing my husband's face and it's stubble, yuck and foreign. I want to be seen as a woman again not a mom! Starts wearing sexy clothes, back to her early 20s so people look at her and say, "Wow she couldn't possibly be a mother!" She even takes up weightlifting and gets a body builders bod. She seeks out work that takes her away from family then realizes that the job hasn’t changed but she has.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Outdoor Mom

The Outdoor Mom cannot stand being at home; she is always on the go. Baby has to snatch whatever sleep he is able to get in the car in between social outings.
Her diary is filled with morning teas, lunches, shopping trips to far away suburbs. Reading about a vintage clothing shop two hours away is not a problem, just bundle kid in car and off we go. No time to potty train, no time to read to kids, no time to cook a choc cake standing at the kitchen bench and licking the bowl, there are too many things to do, places to go!