A look at the fascinating and often infuriating sub-culture of Mothers...from THE MOMMY MAFIA; the Urban Dictionary of Mothers by LJ Charleston - publication date late 2013 - with more than 100 different categories of weird & wonderful Mothers. From Olympic Mom (My kid was walking at nine months, what's wrong with yours?) to Can't Stop Breeding Mom (six kids and another on the way!) Thrift Shop Mom (this dress only cost me $2!) to Natural Birth Interrogator Mom (WHY did you have a C-section? You really missed out on the real motherhood experience!)

Remember, in motherhood, a woman is more dangerous than a shotgun.

If you thought meeting the parents was tough, now it's time to meet the mommies.


Follow the Mommy Mafia on Twitter @themommymafia

Monday, June 6, 2011

Agoraphobic Mom

Agoraphobic Mom lives in a cocoon of motherhood. She will not come to see you; you have to visit her. They are the Mommy Princess, in self-imposed exile from their former world. Their life revolves around the home. Most Agoraphobic Moms have fancy play equipment installed in their back yards, thus deeming a simple trip to the playground unnecessary. One Agoraphobic Mom put her three week old baby into her car for an outing to the supermarket. The baby screamed for the duration of the five minute drive and so she vowed never to put her in the car again. And two years later, she still hasn’t. Agoraphobic Mom is usually very successful in making other Moms feel that they must be doing something wrong by subjecting their kids to the dangers of the outside world. They object to public playgrounds because their child can catch germs from the play equipment. Other children might cough or sneeze and pass on a cold or flu. They don’t mind their children playing in the dirt in their own backyards, but they would never let their kids play in the dirt in public; they are true believers of the urban myth about neighbourhood cats peeing in the playground sand in the still of the night.

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